Scarlett's POV
"Love me?" I could see he was regretting saying it yet he whispered a small yes. How was I supposed to respond to that? We had personally known eachother for about a year but even then we hardly talked.
"Yes, Scar, I love you, I know you probably don't love me and I'm fine with that, well not really, but... Jesus," he sighed.
I looked up at him, he was still hugging me. His sweet blue eyes and perfectly sculptered cheek bones made me sigh appreciativley and this amazing sight. I tip toed a bit and kissed his soft cheek. Very soft cheek, so soft that it was like hugging a fluffy teddy bear, well kissing it.
"You hardly know me, plus there are thousands of girls falling to your feet, dying to meet you an-"
"Scarlett, I know, but imagine if all those girls said that to me, I'd have no one... and I don't want them, I want you. I mean, sure, we have only spoken a bit, but in that, I've fallen in love with you. I promise I'll never hurt you, I care so much," he stopped, like he remembered something. "Arms."
"What?" I gasped.
"Scarlett, please show me your arms," He bit his lip, looking at me with pleading eyes.
"No, I don't, I-"
He grabbed arm but in a gentle way and rolled my sleeve up.
"Shit, oh Scarlett, you can't keep doing this." He looked at me with those blue eyes, sweet and soft. But they were darker and sad. He really did care. I didn't answer him, I couldn't look at him. My gaze was at my feet, hanging my head in shame.
"It's ok, I'm with you for ages, I can keep an eye on you, I can keep you safe." And I believed him. I trusted him and I hardly even knew him. Maybe it was the song Die For You that made me trust him and all the other Black Veil Brides songs or that he has a responsibility to care and look after everyone, including me.
"Do you hate me now?" I whispered it so quietly I'm sure he didn't hear me but he did.
"Do you hate me now?" I whispered it so quietly I'm sure he didn't hear me but he did.
"No! No! Of course I don't! I don't hate you... I told you, I love you. You're so beautiful, you have awesome clothes, your hair is amazing and you are so sweet and innocent. Things that are innocent, I feel I have to protect." I smiled, looking up at him. His eyes visibly lit up and I felt, well, happy. Someone, cares for me. I mean I have Tyler and Selina and they say they love me but that's like family, at least I think so. Unconditional love.
"How do you do it?" I asked, a little louder than when I last spoke.
"Do what?" He burrowed his eyebrows, so cute!
"Make me feel this way? Make people feel this way? Make them happy again?"
"I don't know," he bit his lip, half of it, the side where he didn't have that goddamn sexy lip ring in it.
"Can I tell you a secret?" I said, smirking.
"Now I'm scared but go ahead," we both laughed.
"Well, when I got my haircut I tried to cut it like yours but the hairdresser didn't do that good of a job," I ran my hand through my hair.
"No, no, I can see my haircut in it, I can see it, but I like it this way," he smile and kissed my nose.
"Oh, there you are... uh, hey Andy, ummm, Scarlett, come and sit down again, you should get some rest," Tyler awkwardly stood. His lips pressed into a hardline. I wasn't sure if he was mad but I knew he wasn't too happy. I nodded and sat back down after telling Andy, I'd talk to him soon.
I tried a bit more and finally after what seemed like forever, I fell asleep.
"Do you miss me?"
He was there and I was here. He looked so alive, he looked like he was there. I reached out for him.
"No. Do you miss me?"
"Yes," I choked. I was crying. "Josh, I miss you, please come back, I'm so alone."
"I can't. I want to, but I'm stuck. It's scary, it's not heaven, it's not hell. I've been walking for weeks, months, maybe even years? I can't remember, I've forgotten. I'm forgetting. Life. Friends. You."
I grabbed to reach him, I got to him, I pulled him, I hugged him. My brother, friend. I cried into his shoulder and closed my eyes. When I opened them again, he was gone. I started screaming his name. No! No! He had to be here! He was just here.... No, no, no!
"Scarlett, shh, shh, it's just a dream." I woke up and saw we were still on the plane. Angry passengers glared at me. Had I screamed? I bursted into tears. He was right there, and he just dissapeared. Maybe he wanted me to follow, no! I am not following him, I am not going to die. I am strong. I have people who care and help me. But there was this aching pain. It means me, my dad and mum could be a happy family again. That Josh would be there. Right now, the cons of living are overpowering the pros.
The stewardess came and gave me a cup of water, I gulped it down after mumbling thankyou. Water was so underrated.
Andy kneeled next to me and took my hand. I glanced at Tyler and he looked a little adgitated.
"Hey, you ok, Star?" I froze, Josh... I felt another wave of tears flow down my cheeks.
"Oh... should I not call you that?" He bit his lip in that way.
"No, it's fine," I coughed, I felt like I couldn't breathe, I wanted to get off this plane, the planet. I was breathing hard trying to feel my lungs with air.
"What happened?"
"Just another nightmare... I think it was a nightmare," I coughed some more and the stewardess came back with a plastic jug of water and a cup. I had half the jug in the matter of ten seconds.
The plane landed and I waited impatiently as we filed out this death trap cabin. I'd only been to Berlin, Germany once, it was with my dad during the half term. A pang of pain went through me, I remembered this airport, it was pretty much the same. We breezed past security check. Our bags were already on the busses. We went out to our tour busses that were waiting for us outside the airport. We'd be taken to the venue and while we're setting up for the whole day, Christian would help me learn. He's pretty much mapped out the drum stuff, not the solos though, he said that I just gotta make it up.
When we got there I got so fucking excited! It was big! What surprised me most was some very loyal people were waiting, it was about 10am here but wow. They waved as the busses came past and we waved back. Andy and the rest of BVB signed a few phone cases and bags before going inside with equipment.
While the stage crew was unpacking I went on stage to have a look. HOLY SHIT. The standing area was huge! The circle, at the back was huge too. So many people could be packed in here! I guess it needs to be big because we're only playing one show in Germany as for all the other Europian countries. In the UK, we'll do like two shows in Scotland and then go to the main cities. We'd finish at London then go to America for the American tour.
"Big, huh?"
I whirled round to Andy and nodded. "Yeah... it's huge," I smiled.
I heard a laugh and saw Ashley.
"What?" I asked.
"Big, huh? Yeah, it's huge," he burst out laughing.
"Oh my god you are so fucking dirty Ash," Jake joined in the laugh.
"Come on, Scarlett, I gotta teach you the drums!" CC called.
"Coming!" I smiled at Ashley, Jinxx, Jake and Andy then went to CC.
We spent pretty much the whole day practising. The stage was already set up with CC's drums and BVB's backdrop near the back. We had our drums set up too, but in front.
"Hey, Scarlett, here's some drumsticks," CC smiled giving them to me.
"Finally! Gosh, you don't know how long I have wanted to catch them!"
"Oh well in that case," He took them off me, took a couple of big steps back and chucked them one at a time at me and I caught both. We both laughed. Then I heard a big crowd of noise. I went onto the side of the stage and look out. HOLY MOTHER FUCKER! My jaw dropped at the amount of people piling, the space was hardly filled but there were so many people.
"Scar, come on, it's showtime," Tyler smiled pulling me on to the stage. People starting screaming when the saw us and I felt like I was about to die, oh my fucking god!
"Hey everyone, thanks for coming out tonight... Who's excited for BVB?" Jack shouted. The crowd went absoloutley crazy. This was amazing. I was sitting at the drums playing with the drumsticks, kinda freaking out.
"I'm Jack, this girl here, is Heather, our wonderful new drummer, Scarlett, and that guy there is Tyler," Jack continued. "And we are Breaking Bulletproof Glass."
Ok so first of all, I thought I was just filling in? I'm not the 'new' drummer, I'm the 'our drummer just quite so we need you to play now' drummer. And second, they changed their band name. Pretty cool name.
We played through our set, it was kinda easy, I didn't make as much mistakes as I had that I would but I still made a few. Gladly there was only one drum solo but that was easy for me to pass through, possibly the easiest there was, because I could just make it up as I went but where as the drums, not so much.
Black Veil Brides went on and were as amazing as ever.
After they came off, there was a final cheer from the crowd then everyone backstage congratulated them.
I waited and then said well done. Andy smiled and gave me a hug.
"Well done," I whispered, although, I doubt he hear me because of the noise but he did.
"You too, and Scarlet?"
"Yeah?"
"I love you."
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OMFG!
Ok so... I hope you liked this chapter, it's mah birthday tomorrow and I did promise a chapter up by my birthday...
I was about to give up on this book, until I read Dude Looks Like A Lady by Nonbeliever and OMFG! It's like the best!!!!!!
Anyways, I decided the ending will be UBER sad!!!! Because, you know, I didn't know where I was going with this but now I know. Please don't kill me for this but you'll found out how this will be sad....
I wanted to upload earlier but I had some writiers block, so I just played a few video games, went to my grandma's Skyped a few people and now I am able to write with enthusiasm again...
I NEED AN EDITOR
I think I spelt enthusiasm wrong so...
I write these stories to help me with my English. I have very very shitty English. I mean, it's my first language and all but I'm finding it harder to spell and remember things because I'm learning so many languages. French, Spanish (School Compulsery), Japanese (Mother makes me), Swedish and Korean (Cause why not?).
Anyways, I really enjoyed writing this chapter, vote if you did too, comment please, I'd love feedback... Share to people? And Fan xxxxxxxx
Thankyou!
Listening to Kissing In Cars by Piece The Veil (I can't stop listening to it!!)
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